Woman frustrated because boyfriend criticizes ‘revealing’ clothes
A woman is frustrated by her boyfriend, who criticizes her for wearing clothes that he considers “too revealing”.
The girlfriend posted on Reddit “relationship adviceforum asking for feedback on how to move the situation forward.
She begins the post by explaining that her boyfriend told her he didn’t like her wearing certain clothes.
“I don’t usually wear a bra, and when I’m wearing something tight, you can see the shape of my nipples through the shirt. I sometimes wore it when going out or at the beach, ”describes the author of the message.
While the woman says her boyfriend’s disapproval was “more subtle” when they started dating, her criticisms have recently become more frequent and direct. She mentions that whenever she wears something he deems inappropriate, he makes her feel guilty, saying he wouldn’t feel “good for the rest of the day” if she wore it with him.
“He says it’s because he doesn’t want other people [looking] to me this way or [seeing] my nipples. Most of the time, I don’t want to make a fuss about it, and I’ll just put something else. But sometimes I feel like I’m in control, and I just want to be able to wear whatever I want,” the dejected Redditor conveys.
Before noting that her boyfriend is “really nice most of the time,” the author ends her article by asking for feedback on what to do about her boyfriend’s behavior on the matter.
“It’s an incompatibility issue.”
Response from Reddit users has been mixed. Many users felt that the boyfriend’s behavior was controlling and he didn’t have to tell the postman what to wear.
“It’s your boobs. He can go ahead and be uncomfortable. If you agree, then that’s all you need,” said one Redditor.
“This problem happens too often. If he already knew you and [how you dressed] before dating someone, they shouldn’t expect you to change them. You are free to dress however you want,” another reader agreed.
Others felt that the issue was more complicated.
“He can voice his concerns, and you can agree and compromise with him. If you don’t, then he can choose [whether or not] to be with you. Or if he stays with you but won’t stop talking about it and you’re fed up, then you can choose [whether or not] be with him. That kind of thing that you used to skip because you thought it wasn’t enough to break the relationship could end up being the thing that breaks the relationship,” one Reddit user said.
“It’s not a boundary issue, it’s an incompatibility issue. He needs to be with someone who dresses more conservatively, and you need to be [with] someone who is comfortable with [how] you get dressed,” another person concluded.
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